21 Questions To Ask Your Partner In A New Relationship To Get To Know Them

21 Questions for a New Relationship

When you first start dating, there are hesitant and shynesses because you are unsure of what your partner prefers. If you want to learn more about someone, think about these 21 questions for a new relationship! These are excellent conversation starters for discovering your partner’s interests.

By probing a person’s answers, you can discover more about them. Knowing their values and interests lets you fully comprehend your partner’s viewpoint. 

It can be beneficial to be aware of their interests early on. The bond between the two of you will grow more robust and even closer. So why do you still wait? Continue reading to start chatting!



In a study, social psychologist Arthur Aron discovered that conversing about “deep questions” with a partner increased the likelihood that their relationship would last and develop.

There is no promise that these questions will help you get to know one another better, but when has a relationship ever come with a guarantee? Just being honest with one another can do wonders for your relationship.

Furthermore, only people in brand-new relationships should ask these questions. These 21 questions for a new relationship could help you and your partner rekindle your relationship if you’ve been together for a long.

Questions to ask in a New Relationship

Questions to ask in a New Relationship

1. Do you like the way things are going with us?

Asking your partner this question right away is a good idea. It can sound silly to ask, “Are we boyfriend-girlfriend?” Additionally, it provides space to discuss what is effective and what could use improvement moving forward. To keep the new relationship vibrant and healthy, it’s also an excellent habit to develop to check in regularly.

2. What Makes You Smile No Matter What?

The answer to this query will probably make you and your partner grin. It makes it evident what they value or finds appealing. Maybe it’s something simple, like a bouquet or the sky. 

Everyone needs something to lift their spirits after a long day at work, whether it be a large scoop of ice cream, a leisurely bath, or a bottle of wine. As their partner, you should be able to make them smile when they return from work, looking exhausted.

If you wish to make the other person smile, remember the signals. Re-enacting the incident or carrying out a similar action will make you grin again. This also expresses what makes them happy and the gifts they want.

3. How do you manage your stress?

Self-control is crucial in a new relationship because it allows a person to function.

The desire for a partner she feels comfortable around is understandable for your woman. She may wear you out if she relies on you all the time to decompress, though.

Therefore, it is ideal to have a partner who actively seeks balance.

4. What Do You Mean By Friendship?

For everyone, friendship is crucial. This question will reveal how much your partner prioritizes and cherishes friendship. It also shows who they value highly and whose judgment is most important. You can learn a lot about someone’s friends by listening to how they talk about them.

You might be wondering why it matters. A wise person once said, “The people you spend the most time with define who you are.” As a result, establish new relationships and become friends with your partner’s friends to learn more about his preferred company.

5. What are some of your current life goals?

It’s essential to understand what your woman wants out of life. This personal query shows her motivation. She can also tell that her partner genuinely cares about her personal growth.

Serious questions to ask in a new relationship

Serious questions to ask in a new relationship

6. What are your relationship restrictions?

Find out whether you have similar values by answering these probing questions.

This fantastic technique saves you time from wasting it on relationships that are just not meant to last. That’s not necessarily the worst thing that could have happened because it allows you to go on and find the actual woman of your dreams.

However, if you do share her principles, you can build genuine trust in your relationship.

Guys, you need to know this information before diving in deeper.

7. Do you believe that marriage is required?

On this, people can argue for hours. Many are working to promote the idea that marriage is a legal document. Others firmly defend the line because they think marriage is the pinnacle of relationships and a representation of enduring love and dedication.

Couples should take this seriously. It would be disappointing to spend ten years with someone to discover that you two cannot overcome this problem. 

8. What is the biggest turn-off for you?

There is a line that no one wants to cross in any relationship. It’s over the moment you cross that line. As a result, whenever you start a new relationship, you should inquire where that line is. The differences between each person in this regard might sometimes be astounding.

Things could get awkward if you don’t share each other’s viewpoints. However, knowing that you are different in this area is good. Now is the time to assess your choices.

9. Are you seeking a commitment?

Every partnership should begin with a clear understanding of what is expected. It’s thrilling to transition from casual dating to a committed relationship. Finally, there is someone you want to dedicate your life to. From now on, everything will be exclusive. Similar to how you would expect the same behavior from a partner.

You should check with your partner to see how committed they are, if they are serious about a long-term commitment, and if this relationship is exclusive. Never assume what someone else is thinking. It is only fair that you both discuss it if you are in a new relationship.

10. Will This Be A Serious Relationship?

This question can help you determine whether there is a chance of developing a serious relationship down the road. Therefore, asking it early in the chatting stage is always a good idea.

You need to understand whether the other person is searching for a casual fling or whether they hope to advance the relationship.

11. Do any of your former partners still get in touch with you?

For various reasons, it’s crucial to know if your partner keeps in contact with any of their ex-partners. It might imply any number of things. Perhaps they are still in love with their most recent ex or are pining for a past relationship.

They might be friendly, stay in touch, or debate whether to get back together. Speaking to or not speaking with your ex-partners is perfectly acceptable. Still, the reasons why they’re in contact with them will reveal a lot about them.

12. How recently have you experienced emotion?

Everyone experiences emotions from time to time. Will it be about something unimportant that will pass in a few hours, or will it be about something more significant that lasts longer?

Your partner’s temperament may be revealed by how you respond to this. A concerning symptom or a clue that they are going through a tough time is if they notice that even minor concerns make them emotional.

The inverse is also true; if your partner is emotionally indifferent to most things, this may indicate that they are stoic or have a heart of stone.

Fun questions to ask in a new relationship

Fun questions to ask in a new relationship

13. Where have you wanted to go on vacation the most?

Although it may not seem critical, knowing where your partner has always wished to visit is essential. There may be less compatibility between you than you believe if you have very different travel preferences.

A long-term relationship may need help surviving if your partner prefers to travel to cities. In contrast, you like to go on hiking excursions. On the other hand, once you get started, you’ll realize you and your partner have more in common than you think.

13. Should we experiment with doing something different on essential occasions?

The goal of romance is to maintain the flame in your relationship. And the answers to these queries will deepen your intimacy. Put these suggestions on the table for your upcoming date nights and quality time.

14. What kind of date night would you like to have if you could design it any way you wanted?

Discover their more romantic and seductive side (if they have one). For the two of you, how would they plan a special evening?

A night out in the beautiful city or a peaceful evening at home? Perhaps they enjoy being surprised and dining out on elaborately romantic occasions—time to research and include this topic on your list of potential dates.

Deep questions to ask in a new relationship

Deep questions to ask in a new relationship

15. How recently have you experienced emotion?

Everyone experiences emotions from time to time. Will it be about something unimportant that will pass in a few hours, or will it be about something more significant that lasts longer?

Your partner’s temperament may be revealed by how you respond to this. A concerning symptom or a clue that they are going through a tough time is if they notice that even minor concerns make them emotional.

The inverse is also true; if your partner is emotionally indifferent to most things, this may indicate that they are stoic or have a heart of stone.

16. Let me in on a secret you still need to reveal.

This can be the beginning of a humorous discussion. However, constantly be there for your partner and show gratitude for their willingness to let you into their hearts.

17. What was it like growing up?

You may see someone’s personality by knowing about their childhood. It clarifies many aspects of why they are the way they are.

For instance, someone who experienced parental abandonment may have abandonment difficulties. To feel comfortable, they require reassurance that their partner stays put. 

On the other side, someone who grew up in a caring and fun-loving home can have such a high level of trust in their partner and feel at ease even if they party all night.

18. How do you find it to be among kids?

Ask them how they feel about having kid energy around before asking whether they would like to have children to avoid scaring them off.

19. What’s your top priority right now?

Where is your partner’s life at the moment? Do they attend school and spend the majority of their time there? Are they switching jobs and focusing all of their efforts there? What is currently consuming the majority of their time?

Knowing their priorities, you can assess whether your partner can truly commit to the relationship. If they can, you will be able to manage your expectations in light of their preferences.

Understanding their priorities can also help you better comprehend their lifestyles, exceptionally how their days are organized. 

Knowing when to communicate with them while allowing them the necessary time and space to complete their daily tasks can benefit from this.

20. What are the several ways you express love?

Love languages are the foundation for expressing affection to your partner and play a big part in relationships. Understanding their top ones is necessary since some are less important to your partner than they are to you.

Discover their preferred love language. The goal is to comprehend what makes people feel most appreciated. Share yours to learn about the finest ways to love one another.

21. What has changed about you most recently?

Change is inevitable and occurs occasionally. Changes in your life may significantly impact your new relationship. You want to know the most significant shift in your partner’s life and how they handled it.

The major shift will show you what is most important to them, how they handle problems, how fast they adjust to change, and how receptive they are to new ideas.


All you have to do is ask whenever you ought to know something. Every partnership needs to be able to communicate well, and both partners should be willing to voice their needs and listen to those of the other.

These 21 questions for a new relationship are a fantastic method to learn more about each other deeply and personally. There are always questions to ask and details about your relationship to understand. Developing this as a habit will undoubtedly strengthen and improve your connection.


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